A tale of our city

While looking through some old computer files, I found this story told by a friend a number of years ago.

He and his wife had purchased a small empty lot in Kaaawa. The house had been demo’d by a previous owner years before, without the benefit of a permit. Our friend went to the city’s building department (now known as the Department of Planning and Permitting, or DPP) to apply for a permit to move an old house onto the property. He recounted the exchange that followed.

Did it happen exactly like this? I don’t know. But anyone who has had to deal with DPP knows that it certainly could have. They offer a timeless experience.

DPP: You can’t get a permit. There’s already a house there.

FRIEND: No there’s not.

DPP: Someone’s paid taxes on it. There’s a house.

FRIEND: Okay. Give me a demo permit.

DPP: Oh, first you have to get a Dept of Health permit.

FRIEND: What?

DPP: You have to control the rats and other vermin fleeing from the house as it is demolished.

FRIEND: But there is no house.

DPP: Well, you need that permit to get the demolition permit.

FRIEND: Okay.

DPP: But to get the DOH permit, you’ve got to hire an exterminator to set the traps prior to demolition.

FRIEND: Pay the guy to do nothing?

DPP: Get the DOH permit. Then get the demo permit.

FRIEND: Okay, okay. Now, would someone come and inspect the demo?

DPP: What, are you kidding? There’s no house there. It was torn down years ago.

FRIEND: ARRRRG.


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10 thoughts on “A tale of our city

  1. WhatMeWorry

    And there’s a union for these kinds of workers. Remember when unions once existed to protect workers from unfair exploitation and unsafe working conditions…not the right to keep a job forever despite incompetence, non “thinking outside the box” plus guaranteed pay increases despite it all??

    Now we have more government workers in unions than actual people making things and keeping the country’s economy together so the said unions can use the membership rolls and dues money to influence politics.

    Reply
  2. Lei

    Kailua has gone Gaga for a Wendy’s in Pohakupu. But the City allowed issuance of a permit to start construction of new Wendy,’s just recently. The Pohakupu neighbors alarmed, first said we need a sound barrier wall, to thwart cars in the drive thru for all night long FROSTY’s.
    The City DPP failed and allowed demolition of the old Tesoro and a moss rock wall, that blocked the gas station back entry along the Pohakupu subdivision.
    Now comes Rep. Chris Lee, who rushes State #1 priority CIP for the State to build a higher wall using State tax money on A&B fee simple lands.
    Not ironic. In the twist of this comment from City permit failures to State funded wall for A&B.

    Reply
  3. Kathy

    DPP’s longstanding incompetence problem is structural and leadership failure. DPP has no accountability. The head of the department is “interim” and has been for a long time . Ever tried contacting a department in DPP? Good luck. This is their contact form:
    City and County of Honolulu, Department of Planning & Permitting
    650 So. King St., Honolulu, HI 96813 • Fax: (808) 768-6743
    email: info@honoluludpp.org

    No phone number is listed. Even if you have a direct number, phone calls route to mailboxes that are “full” and you are left with fax or snail mail.

    Reply
  4. Kathy

    DPP has a tragic history of permitting steep slope development in dangerous areas. The department desperately needs reform. Ongoing is the loss of Hawaii’s history as DPP allows developers to bulldoze cultural sites without checking with SHPD or following sustainable community plans.

    DPP has a leadership crisis with only an acting director. Transparency and accountability can right the ship.

    Reply
  5. Brad Sellers

    I look at the two candidates. I envision Rick trying to fire people and just implement new procedures, and being angry when the union ties him up in grievance land for his entire first term. I see Keith coming in and slowly modernizing the department, working with council to change laws where needed, and by and large getting the union to come along for the change.

    Reply
  6. zzzzzz

    The last DPP comment suggests the employee in this case knew the regulations as applied to this case were ridiculous, and had a sense of humor about them knowing that making sense of them was probably above his/her pay grade.

    Reply
    1. Ian Lind Post author

      First, because it’s a clever critique, and entertaining. Second, based on my own experience dealing with the department, and the experiences of several friends, it is certainly believable. It resonates.

      Reply
  7. Lee

    I have recently had to deal with DPP and the ZBA and this sounds just about right. Totally frustrating to deal with them. Things need to CHANGE big time! Hawaii laws and statutes are a joke and the people enforcing them need to be retrained to do a better job and give better service to the people.

    Reply

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